Ah, the eternal question: how to keep toddlers and preschoolers occupied during the big kids’ school time?
The pious answer? Pray.
The humorous answer? Drink.
The unhelpful answer? Get used to the mess and chaos.
I am fairly certain I have read every post and listened to every podcast episode that attempts to answer this question, and I can tell you one thing: they all fall short. None of them has the magic answer, and spoiler alert: I don’t either. There just is no easy way to homeschool in the middle of the chaos of toddlers and preschoolers.
There are, however, a few tips and tricks that make the roar quieter and the messes smaller. So, take solace in the fact that it is not just you; this is a tough season for everyone, and I am told by many a wise mother that better days are ahead. In the meantime, here is what is (sort of) working for us.
Pray.
This is not a trite or pat answer. We have a later 9:00 start time precisely so I can fit in some nuggets of prayer while caring for my early risers (nursing the little one and entertaining my 4-year-old). Then, we start the homeschooling day in prayer. When things are going wrong, I abandon myself to Jesus in prayer like my toddler crawls crying into my lap after scraping her knee. Prayer is like oxygen; it is amazing what the simple act of breathing can do for a person.
Routine
Having an optimized routine can help things to go more smoothly. I try to fill my little ones up before their schooling big siblings wake for the day —- with attention, and with plenty of snacks. We do art, science experiments, and other messy or involved projects while the baby is napping (anyone else still call their youngest “the baby” even though she’s nearly 2?). We have “tea time” with snacks and coloring pages while I do read alouds so their mouths are full and their hands are busy. Having everyone filled up also prevents hanger-induced tantrums, which is always a plus.
Busy Bins
For the longest time, I avoided giving them sensory bins because I didn’t want to deal with the inevitable grains of rice and stray beans on the floor. However, after scrubbing toothpaste and butt cream and paint off various surfaces, I reconsidered and changed the out-of-control messes for limited messes of my choosing. I realized part of the reason my wild child was getting into such trouble every time he was out of sight was because he needed that sensory input I’d been depriving him of. This is a great book on making your own busy bags, and I have a post dedicated to the themed bins that we rotate through. This is a variation on the advice to have toys that they can only access during school times, and it has honestly worked wonders and been a huge relief — totally worth the initial investment and a heck of a lot cheaper than the preschool tuition I’d been considering to solve the problem. The way I see it, these items are necessary parts of our curriculum.
A tip for managing the expense? Create an Amazon wishlist and let relatives know what you’re working on. Kinds honestly love these things so much, and it has been so much better to have toys and activities that actually occupy our kids and stimulate their creativity than another remote control toy or Barbie accessory.
Do Preschool.
So, for a first or only kid, I am not a big fan of preschool. They get everything they need from storytime with mom, playtime in nature, visits to the library, and trips to the zoo — you get the picture. But as our family has grown, my perspective on preschool has changed. What this looks like will depend entirely on the interests and temperament of your individual little one, but having some kind of “school” for your little makes him feel like he, too, is special and a part of the action. This could be his own copy of the worksheet to scribble on alongside his siblings, or he might be ready for his own “table work” with mom. (We use The Good and the Beautiful’s preschool program and kindergarten prep along with Kate Snow’s Preschool Math at Home). We also use the books from My Father’s World. I’d love to implement the whole program, but it is too overwhelming for managing multiple grade levels). You make the call, but the more they feel included, the less they have to act out to garner attention.
Embrace it.
I know I said this advice is unhelpful, but it is also a reminder I need constantly. THIS is the time for snuggles and silly picture books. THIS is the time to bake the cookies and have sweet conversations with our little ones. Especially as our focus moves to educating our older kiddos, it is so easy to lose touch with meeting the needs of our littlest. Remembering that this, too, shall pass, is both a great relief and a cause for sorrow depending on how my day has gone. Our time with our kids is so brief (one of the reasons we homeschool in the first place), and yet how often do I find myself rushing my kids onto the next thing or looking wistfully over the proverbial fence to those ages when the trials of this current stage will be long past?
This stage is sticky, cacophonous, chaotic — a never-ending avalanche of clutter to be swept and booboos to be kissed. But it is also filled to the brim with the sweetest snuggles and the wonder of discovery. GK Chesterton said that “The way to really love a thing is to remember that it may be lost.” So, take the time to remind yourself that these are the days that we will soon long for.